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Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Tears are Words the Heart Can't Say...


                Well ladies and gents, it looks as though I am going to repeat my round of posts from earlier this year. Not the exact posts; that would be silly. I am referring to the format. I will put up posts in rapid fire succession in order to catch you up on what I have missed. Technically there is no need for this since the posts will be about seemingly random things as opposed to events. However, I have a list of topics I just have to get off my chest. In fact, the first set of events will be broken down into multiple posts. In this post and more to come I will talk to you about the approximate third week of March. There was a major holiday, a revival of our themes, and a significant birthday. I will post about the first two next time, as they tie together. But first I want to tell you about March 13th. It would have been my mother’s 46th birthday. As some of you know, my mother passed away this past December. It was a hard time, but I had not really been overcome by grief or anything to that effect. Some may even say I had a lack of a reaction. It will not have been the first time I have heard that, nor will it be the last I am sure. I have learned that I deal with things in my own time. So when the death first occurred, I was there for everybody else but did not exactly mourn openly. Something shut off in my brain. The same cannot be said for her birthday.
                The week of her birthday, I became greatly depressed. If any of you have been paying attention, you will have noticed that is when my posts started abating again. I had many ideas for topics but could not seem to drum up the energy to actually write them out. I worked, came home and just sat on the couch. Then one night, I happened to be going through a box of pictures. I had received two boxes and ironically the box I had never seen before had no effect on me. For some reason, the box that I had gone through on a previous, though recent, occasion was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I lost it. I cried for hours. I can’t claim anything cliché such as I felt better afterward or that all my emotions came flooding out. I simply sat on the floor and cried. Then, I was exhausted so I gave up on the pictures (they are still unsorted) and went to bed. For the rest of the week, as well as the next one, I continued to be depressed. I made it through my days normally for the most part, I was simply too tired to make an effort with anything. Last week, I started to feel better. I will not say I am healed or that I don’t miss my mother. I am still grieving in my own odd way, and I miss her terribly at the most random of moments. But I am happier and trying to enjoy the little moments as much as possible. Therefore, I believe I am heading towards being ok, or at least as ok as I have ever been. (I’m a bit out there if you haven’t noticed)
                This was originally not supposed to be about me, but I believe it’s only fair to tell you all where I am at mentally. This post was just supposed to be about my mother. I have already written a post about her, and in the interest of not giving away too many pertinent details of my life, there isn’t really much more I can really say. Plus, I don’t think I am quite at a point where I can just flow information about her. It’s still a bit painful to think about. But I can say that the day was hard for everybody in my family. It was a sad day all around, and discussions of my mother were prevalent all day among many. As I said, she would have been 46 but she has been telling people she was 25 for as long as I can remember. It would have been the year we were 25 together. And her birthday was very close to one of her 3 favorite holidays. My mother loved Halloween because she enjoyed decorating our yard. She also went absolutely crazy for Christmas with decorations, music, gifts, and so on. But I think her most favorite holiday was St. Patrick’s Day. She was 100% Irish and loved to celebrate that. She went above and beyond with her outfits every year. She painted her nails, found green clothes, put temporary tattoos on her face or drew on it, got stickers for everywhere, dyed her hair (with sprays or something that washed out) and always wore her jacket covered in the pin collection her father started, which she continued over the years. For the past few years, I have had possession of that coat. But nothing ever stopped her from having a blast on St. Paddy’s Day. So this year’s day of the Irish had a sad undertone a bit. But next year it will be celebrated in her honor I’m sure. So here I will say a Happy Birthday (albeit at this point, a little late) to my mother. I hope she had a good one, wherever she was. And I will swear that my next post won’t be sad, so come back and read it soon. Until then…

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